Friday, June 3, 2011

BRIAN SABEAN IS A FUCKING DICK AND OTHER FACTUAL STATEMENTS


"It's one of those things that happens to your family. Until it happens to you and hits home, maybe it's not as real what we're going through."
Jesus, Kenny Rogers, nobody murdered your dog. Your player is hurt. That's all. It sucks that your crazy-good, All Star catcher is out for the season, it really does, but waa. That same play goes down that exact same way 100 times and this result happens, what, once? Twice at most? Shit happens, dickface. Last year, the Rangers had to watch old-ass Edgar Renteria celebrate winning the MVP of the fucking World Series, so don't even pretend that life in baseball is fair in any way, shape or form.

This shit happens all the time in baseball. This wasn't some ridiculous, once-in-a-million-years occurrence. Scott Cousins didn't pull out a gun and shoot Posey in the face. He didn't grab his nuts and rip them off. He made a split-second decision to plow through your catcher -- a perfectly legal play -- and then blew his ass up. Could he have slid? Well, let's see what you have to say about that:
"And if you watch frame by frame from different angles, he does not take the path to the plate to try to score. He goes after Buster, right shoulder on right shoulder, and to me, that's malicious."
You know, because Scott Cousins was definitely watching this all play out frame by frame. That's exactly how fast baseball moves when there's a play at the plate. If you watch closely, you can even see Cousins doing long division on a scratch sheet of paper, calculating the exact trajectory and velocity needed to injure Buster Posey in the most severe way possible. That all happened. Slow it down and watch the tape.

But you're handling it like a grown up, Sabean. You really are. I gotta give you credit for that.
"If I never hear from Cousins again or he never plays another game in the big leagues, I think we'll all be happy."
A grown up who fights umpires at his kid's Little League baseball game. Seriously, Sabean, go fuck yourself. This shit happened a week ago. Grow up. Move on. Stop talking. Stop breathing. Because if I never hear from you again or you never get the chance to sign another shitty, past-his-prime veteran to a terrible contract, then I think we'll all be happy.

[MercuryNews.com]

1 comment:

  1. wonder what he thought about J.T. Snow plowing into Pudge back in 2003. also note that Pudge was a skilled and smart catcher (probably due to good training), so he prepared himself correctly for the play about to come, if anything this is SF's fault for not training Posey on how to set up for a play at the plate. classy move to deflect criticism from him onto poor scott cousins, whose career (as a fourth outfielder) is pretty much over.

    ReplyDelete