Friday, January 27, 2012

SCWS CLASS PARTY: SUMMER CAMP WITH MARIAH CAREY



After a long week of not getting anything done at work because you were reading blogs about sports and stick figures all day, you must be exhausted. Totally understandable. That's why every Friday afternoon, SCWS will be throwing a huge party to celebrate. Kinda like in 3rd grade, when your teacher would completely give up on trying to teach you fractions and instead just bring in pizza and show movies all day and then you'd go home at 2:30. Yeah, those days were awesome. Enjoy.

What we're watching...



FernGully: The Last Rainforest

I watched this movie in elementary school and remember thinking, "I'm never going to mess with the environment again because there are like fairies and shit out there, and what if I'm destroying their land and maybe killing them." The other morning I got out of my car at work and threw a gum wrapper on the ground in the parking lot. Clearly, this movie left a lasting impression.

What we're snacking on...



Sno-Caps & Popcorn

Directions: Pop one bag of buttered(!!!) popcorn and immediately pour it into a bowl. Don't wait. Sprinkle one box of Sno-Caps into the bowl while the popcorn is still hot. Mix everything around a little bit. (Not too much, because then all of the Sno-Caps will wind up at the bottom and that sucks.) Make love to the bowl.

What we're listening to...



Mariah Carey - "Always Be My Baby"

When this song came out, I was 14 and had just been to a summer camp for the first time the year before, so I was still sort of new to the whole thing. I remember watching this video constantly and always wondering if that's what camp was going to be like the next year. Log cabins, camp fires, the girl I had a crush on sneaking out in the middle of the night to go swimming with me... Then I remembered that I went to a day camp, so shit like this could NEVER actually happen. So disappointing.

I did find out, however, that camp counselors are exactly like the irresponsible assholes in this video, drinking shitty beer and playing banjo by the fire while the kids are pretending to sleep. When I eventually became a counselor, myself, we'd have these two-day trips to Disney World where we'd spend one night with the kids at a hotel. We did this twice a summer for the 6+ years I worked there, and I swear to God, every single time, once all of the kids were checked-in to their rooms, wearing their pajamas and ready to go to bed, 93% of the staff would meet in one counselor's room and get DRUNK. AS. SHIT. And then there'd always be two people who decided to "turn in for the night", except everyone knew that what they really went to do was have sloppy, drunken sex because it's summer camp and you're working with these same assholes every day, so there's bound to be some serious sexual tension between people.

And, of course, the next day was hell because you we're trying to wander around Magic Kingdom for twelve hours in the blazing heat with an unbelievable hangover, running on two hours of sleep because you decided to stay up till 4:00 a.m. getting completely blasted the night before.

The moral of the story, obviously, is never send your kids to summer camp. Nobody's watching them.

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