Thursday, July 26, 2012

CARDINALS SPOIL HANLEY'S DODGER DEBUT, CELEBRATE BY SEXUALLY ASSAULTING SKIP SCHUMAKER


Wearing #13 (so fitting), Hanley Ramirez made his debut for the Dodgers last night, getting on base three times, driving in a run and letting a ball bounce off his chest at third in a 3-2 extra innings loss to the Cardinals.

Watch as Rafael Furcal gets mobbed at first base after nothing the game-winning single. Feel the joy as his teammates surround him and, um… punch him in the chest? Pay even closer attention at the :30 mark, as Skip Schumaker (#55) comes out to join the festivities, only to have another gentlemen casually reach in from behind and proceed to TUG ON HIS NUTSACK. WHO DOES THAT?

Seriously, if I'm ever a part of a Major League Baseball team that wins a game in walk-off fashion, I'm just hanging out in the dugout, where it's safe.

(Update: Looks like Deadspin beat me to it (WITH A SLOW-MO CLIP!!!). At least I wasn't the only one to notice. Someone give Skip a hug.)

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