Tuesday, July 22, 2014

KMT and SCwS: first post!

It’s been almost a year since the blog was updated. A ton has changed since then, but the one thing that thankfully remains the same is that Stanton is still a Marlin. The same can’t be said about Morrison, but he wasn’t a fan of the blog so f*ck ‘em. Anyway, back to what’s changed since then: Blogger BoobiesNStanton got married. Congrats, dude! I hope you knew you were trading in your bats and balls for a ball and chain, and that you are only going to see the same PINK PONY from here on out. I didn’t though, so all you single boys out there can breathe a sigh of relief. You still have time! The most that’s changed with me is my hair. Not very exciting, I know. Moving on…As for the Marlins, we thankfully didn't have another godawful re-branding but we switched our roster up again, making us almost unrecognizable from this time last year.

Some things remain the same, such as still wanting to go to a strip club with Stanton, the Marlins are still owned by the devil reincarnated, the one and thankgodforhimbeingthe only Jeff Loria, and we switched up our roster again, making us almost unrecognizable from this time last year. Yes, I know that’s a repeat from above but it happens every year, thus making it a dual purpose statement. Don’t talk back to me! Shut your mouth a keep reading. You have to, Stanton would want you to. Plus, I have a nice rack, and per BoobiesNStanton, I will do a great job keeping up the blog because “No blogger with boobs has ever failed.” So, that being said, here I go, taking my proverbial twirl around the blogging pole, hoping for pure GOLD CLUB.

Wanting to write for a blog has been something I’ve been thinking about for a while but I never took a swing at it, mainly out of laziness. However, this past weekend, I was chatting it up with a very cute guy at the Rowdies soccer game, and he asked me if I was a writer. I said no, not really, although I had considered myself one in my younger years. I asked him why he thought that and he replied “It’s the way you talk about and describe things. You should write, and you should focus on sports because you go to so many sporting events.” (True story. I am constantly at games of some sort. Between my rec league kickball and softball teams, I was at a 2 baseball games (1 Rays, 1 Threshers), 2 soccer games (Rowdies), and a Mud Wars event within the span of 7 days. Yeah, I stay busy.) Anyway, I told that story to the genius who started this beloved blog, and he graciously offered to transfer it to me. I ecstatically accepted, and here I am, me and my rack, posting my first blog.

To introduce myself, I thought it would be nice to do a little look back at my history and involvement with #SCWS. I started following the blog pretty soon after it was started. I thought the name was hysterical, and that the posts were even funnier than the name. I replied to and retweeted every time I saw a new post. I hoped that one day, he would be rewarded with trip to a strip club with GiancarloCruzMichalStanton, and that I could join that magical 2001 SPACE ODYSSEY journey, if an invite if it ever happened.

I offered to live tweet my shenanigans at any of the Rays v Marlins games I went to. (I live in Tampa now and screw you, yes I cheer for the Rays too. I can't help it, I am a baseball fan and have to go to games. My soul would suffer if I didn't. I grew up going to lordonlyknows how many Marlins games, and its ingrained in me to go. Plus, their owner actually gives a ---- about his team, unlike Loria. It's a refreshing change.) 

Here are some highlights of those games.

Me inviting Stanton to a Tampa area strip club. I even offered to let him pick which one we went to--even though my kickball team at the time was sponsored by a SCORES Tampa . Sadly, he never responded.

NEW BALL!!!!!!

I wear that ring on the finger for a reason.

We called this game the #seafoodbattle game.

Me, sitting on my friend's head. Because why not?

YEAH, I AM A.....


This last one is not Marlins or SCwS related, but consider it a bonus because boobs are being shown.

I hope you had as much fun reading this post as I did writing it. I promise to be as irreverent and rude as possible in future posts, and to keep in line with the spirit of the blog's theme and style thus far.

Ohhhhh , one last thing: the #Rack Reference contest.

No one correctly guess the number of times I would reference my rack in this post so the winner is...... no one. Well, one person who guessed has seen it plenty in person, so I guess he is the winner, lucky him.


  1. Nice initial offering, I'm a transplanted Miami fan in the Tampa Bay area as well

  2. As a Cubs fan, I still can't believe how tormented Marlins fans are. You're franchise is 10 minutes old and has 2 World Series. Trust me, it could be worse. Plus, you have a nice rack!

  3. I have just downloaded iStripper, so I can have the sexiest virtual strippers on my desktop.